Some advice. It's not going to be easy to hear, and you won't believe me until after you've gone through the rest of the process.
You're taking all of this way too seriously.
It's just a company. Sure, it was one that you poured everything you had into, and I'm sure you associate a great deal of your self-identity with it, but it's still just a company.
Some context: I sold my first startup, which I co-founded with my wife, to a company about 3 years ago. We worked there for two years, and then they fired me. I had poured so much of myself into trying to make the product survive post-acquisition that when they showed me the door, I just sort of walked around in a daze, not realizing what I was supposed to do next. Then, gradually, I started to realize that there was a life for me after the startup, and one in which I could do better things than I could ever have working for the company that fired me.
Over time I came to realize that the product wasn't really that important. It was just something I was working on for awhile. If I wanted, I could go build a new version of the same product, or I could work on one of a hundred ideas that I have brewing. Once you realize that pretty much everything is ephemeral, you worry less about each individual step in your life and are able to focus more on the big picture. When it gets dark around you, it can seem like the world is much smaller than it actually is.
I think there's something appealing about having an "arc" of some sort to your life story. In reality, life isn't a play in three acts, and you get lots of chances to define and redefine yourself.
Just be honest, clear, and concise with the people around you. Take your share of the responsibility. Take some time to understand what happened, how you feel about it, and what you learned. Use that information to become better in the future.
You're missing my point. I'm saying that while some things seem like they're the end of the world, they're usually not. It's important to remember that when faced with those circumstances, because it keeps you grounded in reality and looking toward the future.
I think he's saying that a failed startup is like the end of your first serious high school relationship. It was your whole world for a while and when it comes crashing down it feels like nothing will ever be right again. But life goes on and if you're lucky you eventually look back and realized that you learned a lot and grew as a person and you've moved forward to other things that are now important to you.
The point of the analogy is merely this: You are telling someone going through a potentially awful experience that you were in an entirely different situation where the outcome for you was far far better.
So if you really want to stick with the analogy, it's like an amicably-divorced-and-remarried man telling a widower to just cheer up.
Comments
Some advice. It's not going to be easy to hear, and you won't believe me until after you've gone through the rest of the process.
You're taking all of this way too seriously.
It's just a company. Sure, it was one that you poured everything you had into, and I'm sure you associate a great deal of your self-identity with it, but it's still just a company.
Some context: I sold my first startup, which I co-founded with my wife, to a company about 3 years ago. We worked there for two years, and then they fired me. I had poured so much of myself into trying to make the product survive post-acquisition that when they showed me the door, I just sort of walked around in a daze, not realizing what I was supposed to do next. Then, gradually, I started to realize that there was a life for me after the startup, and one in which I could do better things than I could ever have working for the company that fired me.
Over time I came to realize that the product wasn't really that important. It was just something I was working on for awhile. If I wanted, I could go build a new version of the same product, or I could work on one of a hundred ideas that I have brewing. Once you realize that pretty much everything is ephemeral, you worry less about each individual step in your life and are able to focus more on the big picture. When it gets dark around you, it can seem like the world is much smaller than it actually is.
I think there's something appealing about having an "arc" of some sort to your life story. In reality, life isn't a play in three acts, and you get lots of chances to define and redefine yourself.
Just be honest, clear, and concise with the people around you. Take your share of the responsibility. Take some time to understand what happened, how you feel about it, and what you learned. Use that information to become better in the future.
I feel it's really unfair for you to compare a sale of a company to crashing and burning in one.
An acquihire and even -fire would seem to be a pretty desirable outcome to our writer.
You're missing my point. I'm saying that while some things seem like they're the end of the world, they're usually not. It's important to remember that when faced with those circumstances, because it keeps you grounded in reality and looking toward the future.
I'm not missing the point - I think your point is inconsiderate.
I think he's saying that a failed startup is like the end of your first serious high school relationship. It was your whole world for a while and when it comes crashing down it feels like nothing will ever be right again. But life goes on and if you're lucky you eventually look back and realized that you learned a lot and grew as a person and you've moved forward to other things that are now important to you.
It doesn't really help to comfort a broken hearted teenager by saying, "don't worry, you'll find love again! Just look at me and my beautiful wife!"
Except that, in your analogy, my wife is now married to someone else.
The point of the analogy is merely this: You are telling someone going through a potentially awful experience that you were in an entirely different situation where the outcome for you was far far better.
So if you really want to stick with the analogy, it's like an amicably-divorced-and-remarried man telling a widower to just cheer up.
Well, that's just, like, your opinion man.
The truth can often seem inconsiderate. That doesn't make it less true
You are right. Sometimes its hard to face a dying dream and other connected dots. Its OK as long as you know you there is much more to do in life.