- PM is busy coming up with a feature that you'll solve with an application global variable just because you want it to go away

- Requirements analysts are making complete sense but it's making you realize how much work is ahead of you, so naturally you hate them outright

- Scrum masters are quietly reciting the differences between waterfall and agile while rubbing a golden chalice

- ETC is an actual department in your organization but no one knows what exactly they do