Given she has graduated with a PhD, she likely isn't totally unmotivated, but possibly given her last year she is depressed and having a hard time putting everything into her work. When you point out what she could do better, she likely already knows it and is not so pissed at you but venting frustration. Hence, your a douche.
Sometimes people also feel the work isn't worthy of their abilities, which sadly I have found of a lot of highly educated but less experienced people. They sometimes don't respect that experience still is more about learning than a lecture is. Maybe she places value there, maybe not.
I'd honestly say regardless of any endowment etc. If you really want to be with her, then talk to her and find out how she is feeling outside of the work stuff. You mentioned you aren't the most sensitive, but if you open the communication you might find out she is frustrated and struggling internally more than you realize/understand. Then ask her if she feels this is something she wants to do or not, that you can understand if she wants to take a step back and find something else because maybe she isn't 100% into what you are doing. You are allowing her to take control here of her destiny without you being a douche. If she says she really wants to stay in and be apart of it, then you ask her, how can you better approach her when your vision is different than hers on writing or whatever. Again, you are putting her in a position to help you which will let her feel valued and bring out some of her natural instincts.
Years of marriage I guess does come in handy here. Good luck!
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Oh boy.
Given she has graduated with a PhD, she likely isn't totally unmotivated, but possibly given her last year she is depressed and having a hard time putting everything into her work. When you point out what she could do better, she likely already knows it and is not so pissed at you but venting frustration. Hence, your a douche.
Sometimes people also feel the work isn't worthy of their abilities, which sadly I have found of a lot of highly educated but less experienced people. They sometimes don't respect that experience still is more about learning than a lecture is. Maybe she places value there, maybe not.
I'd honestly say regardless of any endowment etc. If you really want to be with her, then talk to her and find out how she is feeling outside of the work stuff. You mentioned you aren't the most sensitive, but if you open the communication you might find out she is frustrated and struggling internally more than you realize/understand. Then ask her if she feels this is something she wants to do or not, that you can understand if she wants to take a step back and find something else because maybe she isn't 100% into what you are doing. You are allowing her to take control here of her destiny without you being a douche. If she says she really wants to stay in and be apart of it, then you ask her, how can you better approach her when your vision is different than hers on writing or whatever. Again, you are putting her in a position to help you which will let her feel valued and bring out some of her natural instincts.
Years of marriage I guess does come in handy here. Good luck!
I had a reply written but after reading yours just deleted it! Great suggestion, A+ in diplomacy and persuasion. Hat tip to your years of marriage. ;D