I said that it "sounds sad to me". You escalated it pretty quickly into "my values are better than your values". Did you even read that one-line comment you just cited?
And I'm not talking about casual acquaintances, nor superficial "friendships". I'm talking about real, deep friendships with other human beings. The human race is a social species. This means that it is in our very nature to spend time with other humans and develop bonds with them. Being without friends i.e. lonely can even be detrimental to your physical health [1][2]. Kids at various ages react largely positively to close interaction with other kids [3]. Lack of friendship was also shown correlated with other life problems and behaviors [4].
This is not an issue of being introvert or extrovert. Saying that "computers interest you more than friends" just sounds very cruel and uncaring of others. It is in our nature to empathize with other humans: extreme lack of empathy is often understood as one of the primary symptoms and grounds fro diagnosis of psychopathy [5]. Of course, not to say anything close of the parent comment, but if you really do care about computers more than you do about your friends (and, I assume, implicitly about other human beings), it is maybe wise to think about why is that the case.
I said that it "sounds sad to me". You escalated it pretty quickly into "my values are better than your values". Did you even read that one-line comment you just cited?
Yes.
Did you read the rest of your comment? you go on to cite a bunch of sources supporting your assertion that you should value friends above all else; then you go on to imply that people who have different values may be psychopaths.
I didn't imply that people who have different values are better or worse than each other. I said that, according to a source which is cited on the Wikipedia page for the topic of psychopathy, lack of empathy is often associated with the diagnosis of psychopathy. Lack of empathy doesn't translate directly into lack of dear friends, but my bet is that it's very deeply intertwined.
I still never implied that my values are better. Psychopaths, for example, often believe that their values and views of life are fine, and that the rest of the world is wrong. I can never say whether it's the psychopaths or the non-psychopaths who get it right. (Without rigorous testing, I can actually not reliably claim I am not a psychopath. For one, my empathy scores are moderately lower than male average.) If most of the world agrees that psychopathy should be treated, and the psychopaths say that it shouldn't, then it still doesn't mean that it ultimately has to be treated. I know this sounds like a ridiculous point, but no values can ever be said to be "better" than other values, because "good" is simply so ill-defined in that context. I'm not saying that the OP of the comment is a psychopath, far from it. What I am saying is that our nature instructs us to be empathic and care for our friends and family, and it's not clear to me what I would have to believe and feel to conclude that I care about computers more than I do about my friends.
Only if you seriously think you can use the psychopath diagnosis without judgment. I suppose that is possible? but it's pretty unlikely.
Even if you are using it in a value-neutral way (and I don't believe you are) you are making a huge jump. For example, some people try to de-prioritize friendships because they have been badly hurt by friends in the past; this is far more likely to happen to a deeply empathetic person.
Comments
"Your values are different from mine, and that is sad, because my values are better than your values."
I said that it "sounds sad to me". You escalated it pretty quickly into "my values are better than your values". Did you even read that one-line comment you just cited?
And I'm not talking about casual acquaintances, nor superficial "friendships". I'm talking about real, deep friendships with other human beings. The human race is a social species. This means that it is in our very nature to spend time with other humans and develop bonds with them. Being without friends i.e. lonely can even be detrimental to your physical health [1][2]. Kids at various ages react largely positively to close interaction with other kids [3]. Lack of friendship was also shown correlated with other life problems and behaviors [4].
This is not an issue of being introvert or extrovert. Saying that "computers interest you more than friends" just sounds very cruel and uncaring of others. It is in our nature to empathize with other humans: extreme lack of empathy is often understood as one of the primary symptoms and grounds fro diagnosis of psychopathy [5]. Of course, not to say anything close of the parent comment, but if you really do care about computers more than you do about your friends (and, I assume, implicitly about other human beings), it is maybe wise to think about why is that the case.
[1]: http://edition.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/conditions/07/27/moh.heal...
[2]: http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2013/01/study-dont...
[3]: http://www.aboutourkids.org/articles/do_kids_need_friends
[4]: http://psychcentral.com/lib/the-importance-of-friendship/000...
[5]: http://www.psychologicalscience.org/index.php/publications/j...
Yes.
Did you read the rest of your comment? you go on to cite a bunch of sources supporting your assertion that you should value friends above all else; then you go on to imply that people who have different values may be psychopaths.
I didn't imply that people who have different values are better or worse than each other. I said that, according to a source which is cited on the Wikipedia page for the topic of psychopathy, lack of empathy is often associated with the diagnosis of psychopathy. Lack of empathy doesn't translate directly into lack of dear friends, but my bet is that it's very deeply intertwined.
I still never implied that my values are better. Psychopaths, for example, often believe that their values and views of life are fine, and that the rest of the world is wrong. I can never say whether it's the psychopaths or the non-psychopaths who get it right. (Without rigorous testing, I can actually not reliably claim I am not a psychopath. For one, my empathy scores are moderately lower than male average.) If most of the world agrees that psychopathy should be treated, and the psychopaths say that it shouldn't, then it still doesn't mean that it ultimately has to be treated. I know this sounds like a ridiculous point, but no values can ever be said to be "better" than other values, because "good" is simply so ill-defined in that context. I'm not saying that the OP of the comment is a psychopath, far from it. What I am saying is that our nature instructs us to be empathic and care for our friends and family, and it's not clear to me what I would have to believe and feel to conclude that I care about computers more than I do about my friends.
Only if you seriously think you can use the psychopath diagnosis without judgment. I suppose that is possible? but it's pretty unlikely.
Even if you are using it in a value-neutral way (and I don't believe you are) you are making a huge jump. For example, some people try to de-prioritize friendships because they have been badly hurt by friends in the past; this is far more likely to happen to a deeply empathetic person.