Basically if you were standing at the event horizon the pull on your feet would be several billion times the pull on your head.

This is not always the case. If the black hole is massive enough there won't be strong tidal force at the event horizon to disintegrate objects.

I don't know GR enough to judge your other statements. However, when discussing the time slowing down close by a black hole I suspect one must take into account of the strong gravity field and not just the velocity of the falling object.