Your family is right: 'programmer' is the software equivalent of a construction worker, and you almost certainly do not get paid for writing open source software.
Whether these truths are bad things is another matter though. Where would the world be without construction workers? Can you imagine what a building would cost if the architects also had to do the actual construction? And would it be a better building for it? And who would have heard of Linus Torvalds if he hadn't written some open source software? Your name on a popular project is a great advertisement for yourself. It gives you a broader choice of employers and it helps your salary negotiation.
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Your family is right: 'programmer' is the software equivalent of a construction worker, and you almost certainly do not get paid for writing open source software.
Whether these truths are bad things is another matter though. Where would the world be without construction workers? Can you imagine what a building would cost if the architects also had to do the actual construction? And would it be a better building for it? And who would have heard of Linus Torvalds if he hadn't written some open source software? Your name on a popular project is a great advertisement for yourself. It gives you a broader choice of employers and it helps your salary negotiation.