In general: Join Toastmasters, it will help with small talk and making speeches. Learn to tell jokes, a conversation is much easier if the other person is relaxed and laughing. Be well read and know how to argue in a non-confrontational manner. It is not always necessary to use the large blunt object to make a point.

If you are looking to get married and you need help meeting someone then google 'Doc Love' and read his free stuff or listen to his internet radio show. I was referred to a counselor for this sort of thing by a friend, the counselor was teaching the same methods of recognizing what is being communicated (by her and by me)

I tend not to notice non-verbal behavior or know what message I'm sending except in formal situations. At the time I wasn't ready for the information so it was frustrating. Later through I was and it has helped.

If you have problems with recognizing non-verbal behavior look into the work of Paul Ekman; again very helpful.