You're right; nobody would ever suffer long-term anger and resentment at decisions that somebody else made for them; it doesn't make sense. It was out of my hands, so I'm totally okay with it! That's why teenagers and their parents get along so well, why women didn't really want the vote, and why working in a bureaucracy is so good for your mental health.
Yeah, I know you're serious. I'm just pointing out that there's a difference (and evidently one that is important psychologically) between a situation where there is only one possibility and a situation where there are many possibilities, but somebody else chooses for you. I know people who stayed angry for years because their parents made them go to a certain college or their boss canceled a product line they created.
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You're right; nobody would ever suffer long-term anger and resentment at decisions that somebody else made for them; it doesn't make sense. It was out of my hands, so I'm totally okay with it! That's why teenagers and their parents get along so well, why women didn't really want the vote, and why working in a bureaucracy is so good for your mental health.
No no, seriously. There was a TED presentation about this unintuitive phenomenon. It was posted here a while ago.
http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_...
edit: Fixed the link, it wasn't the one I meant to link to.
Yeah, I know you're serious. I'm just pointing out that there's a difference (and evidently one that is important psychologically) between a situation where there is only one possibility and a situation where there are many possibilities, but somebody else chooses for you. I know people who stayed angry for years because their parents made them go to a certain college or their boss canceled a product line they created.