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Comment on Ineligible Bachelors: Indian Men Living in U.S. Strike Out

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If I have learned one thing about arranged marriages from my close-knit extended family of 100+, it is that no two arranged marriages are same.

The ONE element that almost all arranged marriages I've seen do have in common is SOME strong referral or existing friendship between the two families. In that sense, they work a lot like VC referrals:)

The type of arranged marriage most common to my larger family is a love marriage. Oxymoron you say? Well, not really. What happens is the girl and guy meet(usually at school) and gradually word starts spreading. When the news makes its way to the parents, if the parents know the other family and approve of it, you are usually good to go. The "love marriage" is smoothly converted into an "arranged marriage". All my uncles(and my father) got married through this route.

I guess I am just not sure of how common the stereotype arranged marriage where a dude is forcefully dumped on a girl is. Notice all the negative connotation that is assumed by the stereotype.

All the while I have a few aunts who got married without having seen the guy until wedding day. This was may be 30 years ago. They are all still married and pretty happy. Lastly, with 50+ couples in my extended family in last 40 years, there have been fewer than five divorces(credit to Geni for handy stats).

So does this process seem weird? Hell yes. Could it result in happy marriages? Seems like it, at least for one family.

"All my uncles(including my Dad)"

I think the statement is mathematically incorrect.

Not necessarily. If his parents were brother and sister, his dad would also be his uncle.

But the OP most likely meant "All my uncles AND my dad"

Heh. Nice catch.

The word "and" instead of "including" is more appropriate.

The term uncle means different things to people from different cultures

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