Cities being dependent on workers being present at commercial office buildings appears to be a uniquely American problem.
Most of my American friends I know turn to the suburbs as a default for "family" style living once they have kids. Imagine their bemusement when they go to a place like Amsterdam or Tokyo and see plenty of families with small children walking around. Heck, you don't even have to go far to see how a city can be a great place for a family, just look at Boston.
Cities, when done correctly, are a better place to raise a family than the suburbs. And yet, when done incorrectly, are terrible.
"Cities, when done correctly, are a better place to raise a family"
The birth rates say otherwise. Cities universally have very very low rates of childbirth. So low that they usually have to depend on a constant inflow from rural areas just to maintain their population. Its a pattern observed across the entire world. And its remarkably clear from the numbers.
You could argue there are a couple of exceptions. If the child is going to be a musician then perhaps a city is better. But I suspect you are confusing being born with millions in a trust fund with living in a city. Those aren't the same thing.
You're conflating the opportunity cost of having a child with the actual logistics of raising a child.
Cities are by definition economical logistical hubs. It's where the jobs and opportunities are. Most people aren't saying "gee I better pack up and move to suburbia before having a child" it's more like "having a child could cost me my high-paying job so I better not". And that issue is exacerbated in the U.S. with the worst parental-leave policy among developed nations. Regardless though, the trend will still exist in countries with generous parental-leave policies because having a child is an opportunity cost in an urban environment. That doesn't mean the environment itself isn't conductive to raising the child. Completely different stories.
And that issue is exacerbated in the U.S. with the worst parental-leave policy among developed nations.
NYC's TFR was 1.55 in 2021. London's TFR was 1.35 in 2024. Paris TFR was 1.27 in 2024. Other US cities are not really comparable to the European ones, but the broader point is that parental leave has nothing to do with TFR. Norway and Sweden have TFRs around 1.44 while the US has it 1.6-1.8
it's more like "having a child could cost me my high-paying job so I better not"...having a child is an opportunity cost in an urban environment
At least in the US and speaking generally, people with high incomes in urban areas move to suburbs once they have kids. I would like to see a citation for your "opportunity cost" claim, because high income jobs also come with good benefits like generous parental leave policies.
Counterpoint. The US has a higher birth rate than any country in Europe. Many of which have your parental-leave policies. BTW, there is absolutely no correlation between governmental policies and birth rate. You can't bully people into have kids. Population density is the most strongly correlated factor with birth rate.
That's the big monomer: "walking" around. Many American cities (especially on the western end) aren't made to have families walking around. They aren't unwalkable, but they aren't welcoming you to walk. Among several other factors in US urban environments.
And to add the final nail to the coffin: even if you tried to make it walkable, real estate prices drive you back out. The biggest draw to suburbs is simply one of cost. $2200 median rent in downtown LA (1 room) vs. $1450 for a suburb 20 miles north?
The real cost of suburbia has been aggressively hidden for decades and is only now becoming realized as even gen-Z buyers with college degrees are getting priced out of starter suburban homes.
The solution is to aggressively tear down draconian zoning laws that force businesses to build obscenely large parking lots and forbid mixed-used developments. More American-style suburban homes with 2 yards, a 2 car garage, and 3 bedrooms is not going to help with prices at all, in fact, it's likely to make the housing crisis in every country worse. The rent itself is not the only cost but the utilities as well. When you build another 100 spread out homes in suburbia, even if the city subsidizes the cost of all that piping, wiring, drainage, and asphalt, it comes back to you in the form of tax or cuts to amenities like parks, museums, and other public goods. Suburbia isn't "cheaper" than the city, it just shifts the cost from rent/mortgage elsewhere.
This isn't just abstract wish-listing by the way. It's real policy proposal that has been tested, and demonstrated to work.
I grew up in Boston. My parents took the train to work, my brother and I took city buses and/or trains to school, or walked when we were younger (elementary school).
I cannot afford to raise a family in Boston now however. I live in a different, cheaper (but still great in many ways) city and it's mostly automobile oriented. I would LOVE to live in a European style city, hell I'd love to live in actual Europe but that just isn't feasible for me.
Please know that not every American is war mongering monster truck driving redneck. I am aware of what the oil and auto industries did to the US in the 20th century. I can't simply wish it away by snapping my fingers.
As someone who pushed to raise our family in the city only to eventually end up in the suburbs, the suburbs are better for kids - which is why we move there.
Amsterdam and Tokyo are lovely cities but they both suffer from extremely low fertility, so it doesn't seem like people chose them to have a family. Walkable is great but having a little more room with a nice backyard and a car to take the kids places is great.
I think a better split would be between city mice and country mice.
I live close to the Boston light pollution bubble. I've worked within Boston, have had friends in suburban Boston, and it's a place to raise a family if you are a city mouse and can live with the noise and crowds and have plenty of cash, because everywhere you go, somebody has their hand out for money.
I'm a country mouse, and if I have to deal with more than 5 or 10 people a week, it's getting close to too many people. When I spent a few days in Vermont under really dark skies and with not many people, I felt the best I had in months.
I think instead of trying to proclaim which is the better space for raising families or living, make it possible for someone to live in a place that's best for them, be it a country mouse or a city mouse. One size does not fit all. Heck, it doesn't even fit many.
Comments
Cities being dependent on workers being present at commercial office buildings appears to be a uniquely American problem.
Most of my American friends I know turn to the suburbs as a default for "family" style living once they have kids. Imagine their bemusement when they go to a place like Amsterdam or Tokyo and see plenty of families with small children walking around. Heck, you don't even have to go far to see how a city can be a great place for a family, just look at Boston.
Cities, when done correctly, are a better place to raise a family than the suburbs. And yet, when done incorrectly, are terrible.
"Cities, when done correctly, are a better place to raise a family"
The birth rates say otherwise. Cities universally have very very low rates of childbirth. So low that they usually have to depend on a constant inflow from rural areas just to maintain their population. Its a pattern observed across the entire world. And its remarkably clear from the numbers.
You could argue there are a couple of exceptions. If the child is going to be a musician then perhaps a city is better. But I suspect you are confusing being born with millions in a trust fund with living in a city. Those aren't the same thing.
You're conflating the opportunity cost of having a child with the actual logistics of raising a child.
Cities are by definition economical logistical hubs. It's where the jobs and opportunities are. Most people aren't saying "gee I better pack up and move to suburbia before having a child" it's more like "having a child could cost me my high-paying job so I better not". And that issue is exacerbated in the U.S. with the worst parental-leave policy among developed nations. Regardless though, the trend will still exist in countries with generous parental-leave policies because having a child is an opportunity cost in an urban environment. That doesn't mean the environment itself isn't conductive to raising the child. Completely different stories.
NYC's TFR was 1.55 in 2021. London's TFR was 1.35 in 2024. Paris TFR was 1.27 in 2024. Other US cities are not really comparable to the European ones, but the broader point is that parental leave has nothing to do with TFR. Norway and Sweden have TFRs around 1.44 while the US has it 1.6-1.8
At least in the US and speaking generally, people with high incomes in urban areas move to suburbs once they have kids. I would like to see a citation for your "opportunity cost" claim, because high income jobs also come with good benefits like generous parental leave policies.
Counterpoint. The US has a higher birth rate than any country in Europe. Many of which have your parental-leave policies. BTW, there is absolutely no correlation between governmental policies and birth rate. You can't bully people into have kids. Population density is the most strongly correlated factor with birth rate.
That's the big monomer: "walking" around. Many American cities (especially on the western end) aren't made to have families walking around. They aren't unwalkable, but they aren't welcoming you to walk. Among several other factors in US urban environments.
And to add the final nail to the coffin: even if you tried to make it walkable, real estate prices drive you back out. The biggest draw to suburbs is simply one of cost. $2200 median rent in downtown LA (1 room) vs. $1450 for a suburb 20 miles north?
The real cost of suburbia has been aggressively hidden for decades and is only now becoming realized as even gen-Z buyers with college degrees are getting priced out of starter suburban homes.
The solution is to aggressively tear down draconian zoning laws that force businesses to build obscenely large parking lots and forbid mixed-used developments. More American-style suburban homes with 2 yards, a 2 car garage, and 3 bedrooms is not going to help with prices at all, in fact, it's likely to make the housing crisis in every country worse. The rent itself is not the only cost but the utilities as well. When you build another 100 spread out homes in suburbia, even if the city subsidizes the cost of all that piping, wiring, drainage, and asphalt, it comes back to you in the form of tax or cuts to amenities like parks, museums, and other public goods. Suburbia isn't "cheaper" than the city, it just shifts the cost from rent/mortgage elsewhere.
This isn't just abstract wish-listing by the way. It's real policy proposal that has been tested, and demonstrated to work.
https://www.planning.org/planning/2022/spring/a-business-cas...
I grew up in Boston. My parents took the train to work, my brother and I took city buses and/or trains to school, or walked when we were younger (elementary school).
I cannot afford to raise a family in Boston now however. I live in a different, cheaper (but still great in many ways) city and it's mostly automobile oriented. I would LOVE to live in a European style city, hell I'd love to live in actual Europe but that just isn't feasible for me.
Please know that not every American is war mongering monster truck driving redneck. I am aware of what the oil and auto industries did to the US in the 20th century. I can't simply wish it away by snapping my fingers.
As someone who pushed to raise our family in the city only to eventually end up in the suburbs, the suburbs are better for kids - which is why we move there.
Amsterdam and Tokyo are lovely cities but they both suffer from extremely low fertility, so it doesn't seem like people chose them to have a family. Walkable is great but having a little more room with a nice backyard and a car to take the kids places is great.
Kids are happy and well im cities. Adults dont want kids in the first place.
I think a better split would be between city mice and country mice.
I live close to the Boston light pollution bubble. I've worked within Boston, have had friends in suburban Boston, and it's a place to raise a family if you are a city mouse and can live with the noise and crowds and have plenty of cash, because everywhere you go, somebody has their hand out for money.
I'm a country mouse, and if I have to deal with more than 5 or 10 people a week, it's getting close to too many people. When I spent a few days in Vermont under really dark skies and with not many people, I felt the best I had in months.
I think instead of trying to proclaim which is the better space for raising families or living, make it possible for someone to live in a place that's best for them, be it a country mouse or a city mouse. One size does not fit all. Heck, it doesn't even fit many.