[WARNING - sorry if this is considered trollish - this is my own analysis, where I try to consider the general issue without giving in to emotions]
I am concerned that the positive outlook is given and shared ( and commented here on HN) by persons who describe themselves as parents.
Besides the potential biais due to social pressure (not liking kids is socially throwned upon, which might favor expressing a positive opinion and keeping quiet about a negative opinion) I wonder how much of this is about sunk costs?
I mean, when you have a child, it's a sunk cost - you can't get rid of it (putting a child to adoption is also socially throwned upon) or decide it would have been better to do without one, so you try and get the best of it.
[Even considering this, you will have to take care of it for 18 years (legally) and then add financial costs for the child college/university etc.]
Considering most couple stick with a limited number of kids, the marginal return seems to decrease.
But given the social pressure to a) like children and b) do not put children into adoption, maybe we are not just looking at marginal returns, but at what the real decision should be when sunk costs are removed.
The fact, noted by other posters, that kid makes you efficient is at least doubtful. Maybe you will be more efficient for the time spent at work, but if you spend much less time that your "improved" efficiency factor, as most parents seem to like spending time with kids, you are overall less efficient.
In my experience, kids do make you 2x-3x more efficient, at least. You can only do so much real work in a day and you're forced to move that work into a smaller time interval. However, your mileage may vary.
I think the positive outlook given my parents simply stems from the fact that they wouldn't make a different decision if they had to do it all over again, even if it was a giant pain in the ass. It's less of an unconcious aversion to admitting mistakes and more that, after all is said and done, they would rather have their child (and the memories of them) than to spend 18 more years being childless. Childlessness is fun but it does lose novelty, and some things are worth it even though they can be hard.
Comments
[WARNING - sorry if this is considered trollish - this is my own analysis, where I try to consider the general issue without giving in to emotions]
I am concerned that the positive outlook is given and shared ( and commented here on HN) by persons who describe themselves as parents.
Besides the potential biais due to social pressure (not liking kids is socially throwned upon, which might favor expressing a positive opinion and keeping quiet about a negative opinion) I wonder how much of this is about sunk costs?
I mean, when you have a child, it's a sunk cost - you can't get rid of it (putting a child to adoption is also socially throwned upon) or decide it would have been better to do without one, so you try and get the best of it.
[Even considering this, you will have to take care of it for 18 years (legally) and then add financial costs for the child college/university etc.]
Considering most couple stick with a limited number of kids, the marginal return seems to decrease.
But given the social pressure to a) like children and b) do not put children into adoption, maybe we are not just looking at marginal returns, but at what the real decision should be when sunk costs are removed.
The fact, noted by other posters, that kid makes you efficient is at least doubtful. Maybe you will be more efficient for the time spent at work, but if you spend much less time that your "improved" efficiency factor, as most parents seem to like spending time with kids, you are overall less efficient.
In my experience, kids do make you 2x-3x more efficient, at least. You can only do so much real work in a day and you're forced to move that work into a smaller time interval. However, your mileage may vary.
I think the positive outlook given my parents simply stems from the fact that they wouldn't make a different decision if they had to do it all over again, even if it was a giant pain in the ass. It's less of an unconcious aversion to admitting mistakes and more that, after all is said and done, they would rather have their child (and the memories of them) than to spend 18 more years being childless. Childlessness is fun but it does lose novelty, and some things are worth it even though they can be hard.