You're neglecting all the parts where you've got to sign your install binaries.

This takes less than 15 minutes when you know how to do it. Arguing with a distribution takes weeks. Arguing with dozens of distributions could take months.

You are approaching this solely as a solo indie dev would - which is why, with few exceptions, only solo dev software is on Linux.

They will happily stonewall you on many other small issues, however.

You should see even a fraction of what developers on Linux have been stonewalled over. I will literally take Apple.