Having your children stop talking to you is not abuse, and trying to frame it as such is offensive to people who have been subjected to actual abuse.
If your children have tried to stop talking to you, and you keep trying to contact them, and they name call or swear, that's not abuse. If they've said they want nothing to do with you, even if you don't agree with the reasons, and you keep trying to be involved in their lives, then they have a right to be angry at you for not respecting their wishes.
Your children do not owe you anything.
Now there are a whole host of reasons that children want nothing to do with their parents, and given this post does not list physical abuse, but does list "coldness", "bullshit", "biting the hand that feeds you"[1], and to me most notably "evil" as the abuses. That last one to me really puts this in the general feeling of parents who mistreat their children for being "evil" (they're LGBT, not conforming to whatever gender norms the parents have, aren't being religious enough, etc are the common ones), or just have those extreme American christian groups that encourage beating children, etc. Certainly I've seen enough cases of the former personally where the parents are abusive, but get upset when their children move out the moment they can and want nothing to do with them, and then have outbursts that are nearly identical to the "content" of this site.
u/freddie_mercury correctly mentioned that if people haven't, that they should read The Missing Missing Reasons before taking this site at face value. Abusive parents seem extremely unwilling to acknowledge that anything they do is wrong, and therefore present any action taken by their children to distance themselves as being unreasonable and/or unfair (or "character assassination" as this site claims).
I get that their are parents who may not know what they did, or maybe they did nothing at all, but their child[ren] joined one of the many religions and cults that require you cut out any family members who aren't also in that religion or cult, which I get would terrible, but the hyperbole and the terminology on this site screams "I am an abusive parent, think my children owe me, and they are required to include me in their adult lives regardless of any of my actions".
[1] though again, your children do not owe you anything simply because you're doing what you are legally and morally required to do as a parent.
My siblings (three of us) and I have entirely cut off our parents.
Recently my youngest brother started receiving letters from them. He moved out, never gave an address, and told them to not contact him. Yet the letters come inviting him back to a “welcoming” home.
And that’s just one of the more “normal” behaviors they exhibit.
Harassment seems too harsh a word but it’s a clear disrespect for boundaries and privacy.
I have a hard time reading these stories without feeling like there’s missing information. I’m intimately familiar with these psuedo-confused attitudes. They play victim yet there’s huge holes in all their stories. All three kids left and yet…nothing but confusion.
Comments
Having your children stop talking to you is not abuse, and trying to frame it as such is offensive to people who have been subjected to actual abuse.
If your children have tried to stop talking to you, and you keep trying to contact them, and they name call or swear, that's not abuse. If they've said they want nothing to do with you, even if you don't agree with the reasons, and you keep trying to be involved in their lives, then they have a right to be angry at you for not respecting their wishes.
Your children do not owe you anything.
Now there are a whole host of reasons that children want nothing to do with their parents, and given this post does not list physical abuse, but does list "coldness", "bullshit", "biting the hand that feeds you"[1], and to me most notably "evil" as the abuses. That last one to me really puts this in the general feeling of parents who mistreat their children for being "evil" (they're LGBT, not conforming to whatever gender norms the parents have, aren't being religious enough, etc are the common ones), or just have those extreme American christian groups that encourage beating children, etc. Certainly I've seen enough cases of the former personally where the parents are abusive, but get upset when their children move out the moment they can and want nothing to do with them, and then have outbursts that are nearly identical to the "content" of this site.
u/freddie_mercury correctly mentioned that if people haven't, that they should read The Missing Missing Reasons before taking this site at face value. Abusive parents seem extremely unwilling to acknowledge that anything they do is wrong, and therefore present any action taken by their children to distance themselves as being unreasonable and/or unfair (or "character assassination" as this site claims).
I get that their are parents who may not know what they did, or maybe they did nothing at all, but their child[ren] joined one of the many religions and cults that require you cut out any family members who aren't also in that religion or cult, which I get would terrible, but the hyperbole and the terminology on this site screams "I am an abusive parent, think my children owe me, and they are required to include me in their adult lives regardless of any of my actions".
[1] though again, your children do not owe you anything simply because you're doing what you are legally and morally required to do as a parent.
My siblings (three of us) and I have entirely cut off our parents.
Recently my youngest brother started receiving letters from them. He moved out, never gave an address, and told them to not contact him. Yet the letters come inviting him back to a “welcoming” home.
And that’s just one of the more “normal” behaviors they exhibit.
Harassment seems too harsh a word but it’s a clear disrespect for boundaries and privacy.
I have a hard time reading these stories without feeling like there’s missing information. I’m intimately familiar with these psuedo-confused attitudes. They play victim yet there’s huge holes in all their stories. All three kids left and yet…nothing but confusion.