Nodding gets me into trouble. It's made me a "good listener" to quote many people from my personal history. I start nodding, people keep talking. It takes an external interruption to get me out of the situation. And that's where I feel I'm 'socially awkward.' I get along with people just fine, but I find getting out of undesirable situations to be a Hard Problem.
Empathy. This is the root of the problem. I'm an American male with empathy. That's not a complaint, but an important observation of critical self-analysis.
I know the feeling, sometimes it's ok to interrupt people. You just need to practice the 'conclusive' tone of voice and say something appropriate, e.g. "Well, I guess that's just the way it is" ... pause ... "Good talking to you!"
This is actually a really good situation to be in-learning the skill of ending conversations is much easier than learning how to get people to open up in the first place.
To end a conversation gracefully, try something like:
1. I'm sorry, but I have to XYZ. It was really nice talking to you.
2. Either suggest a useful piece of information related to their interests ("If you like Thai food, you really should check out Siam Square!") or introduce them to someone else ("You should talk to Bob, he knows all the good Thai places around here.")
Ending with something positive leaves them with a fond memory of you, plus it tends to avoid making people feel jilted.
Comments
Nodding gets me into trouble. It's made me a "good listener" to quote many people from my personal history. I start nodding, people keep talking. It takes an external interruption to get me out of the situation. And that's where I feel I'm 'socially awkward.' I get along with people just fine, but I find getting out of undesirable situations to be a Hard Problem.
Empathy. This is the root of the problem. I'm an American male with empathy. That's not a complaint, but an important observation of critical self-analysis.
I know the feeling, sometimes it's ok to interrupt people. You just need to practice the 'conclusive' tone of voice and say something appropriate, e.g. "Well, I guess that's just the way it is" ... pause ... "Good talking to you!"
This is actually a really good situation to be in-learning the skill of ending conversations is much easier than learning how to get people to open up in the first place.
To end a conversation gracefully, try something like: 1. I'm sorry, but I have to XYZ. It was really nice talking to you. 2. Either suggest a useful piece of information related to their interests ("If you like Thai food, you really should check out Siam Square!") or introduce them to someone else ("You should talk to Bob, he knows all the good Thai places around here.")
Ending with something positive leaves them with a fond memory of you, plus it tends to avoid making people feel jilted.