I agree with the expertise statement. I think the money was somewhat covered tangentially with the Weight Watcher's comment. Basically it's WW (points, prepackaged meals, guides) for body building.
What I didn't feel was a connection to your product. I can't connect with your disease, and having to recover weight as how this is posed. If you turned it around and said something to the effect of "I lost a bunch of weight due to my disease and I had to gain back muscle mass in time for football season" then perhaps that would draw in more people. You leave off "football" and just go with a more generic sports to draw in more people. What's the customer's pain? While your disease is the reason for you designing this program, it's not what makes me use it.
Your situation reminded me of Titin, a weighted training vest created by someone at my school. I've heard his pitch and (IMO) it's banking more on pity points than actual product. I don't think you want people to pity you, but instead understand your passion for making this and that you'll continue to improve on it.
Comments
I've never done a pitch. However I have recently gained weight through a weight training programme (with a careful eye on nutrition).
Reading yours it left me thinking.
1. How would it make money.
2. There's a load of information out there on gaining weight how would you compete with that. (How are you going to acquire traffic).
3. Where's your expertise, you didn't mention how much weight you put on or what you learned.
I agree with the expertise statement. I think the money was somewhat covered tangentially with the Weight Watcher's comment. Basically it's WW (points, prepackaged meals, guides) for body building.
What I didn't feel was a connection to your product. I can't connect with your disease, and having to recover weight as how this is posed. If you turned it around and said something to the effect of "I lost a bunch of weight due to my disease and I had to gain back muscle mass in time for football season" then perhaps that would draw in more people. You leave off "football" and just go with a more generic sports to draw in more people. What's the customer's pain? While your disease is the reason for you designing this program, it's not what makes me use it.
Your situation reminded me of Titin, a weighted training vest created by someone at my school. I've heard his pitch and (IMO) it's banking more on pity points than actual product. I don't think you want people to pity you, but instead understand your passion for making this and that you'll continue to improve on it.